I don't want a superficial hi-bye relationship with my grandparents, but lately, especially since last night, it's becoming apparent to me that it may have to be that way if I want to live a life I want to live. but a life without a strong relationship with my grandparents doesn't seem like a life worth living, you know? so, I'm torn.
never thought I was the perfect goodie girl in my grandparents' mind until I've bursted that bubble. to be honest, until now, I don't even know which part of me is wrong. getting a new job... catching up with friends... wanting to earn more money to save up... not wanting to rely so much on my mother... are these things so bad? honestly, they make me feel as though I'm going out clubbing every night with my friends, getting drunk, smoking weed or something. that tone when they speak to me, the hmm-sure line ee relays back to me (as if to say 'ok, sure, yeah right')... it all feels so superficial.
tonight, Popo even spelled it out for me: 'I'm happy when you're at home, safe and sound, within the confines of your house'. couldn't disagree more, tried to relay another perspective to her... but mid-sentence, I just gave up. and kinda let it slide.