Yesterday, I caught up with the girls and it was nice. It was nice to see them again (I hadn't seen Khim in a while), and I was actually surprised at how much Khim talked yesterday. She's usually a talker, but around us and other friends, she's usually the quiet one. So it was great to listen to her, and it didn't matter what she said... it could be super important, or super trivial... but that's the point, isn't it? Catching up with friends and talking about whatever. Feeling free to do so, and such.
Sometimes I'm not sure if I'm being too liberal with my words, giving too much of myself away. With new friends, I'm able to cast a certain self that I was 'happy' with, not giving too much of myself away at too fast a rate. With my old friends, though, sometimes I wonder if I'm going too fast for them. Even though we had been friends for years and years, sometimes I'd say something and maybe it was a tad on the side of sarcastic, and they won't get it. As if I had said something offensive, or just something they couldn't relate to. There are moments, like that, and I wonder if it's me that's the problem.
Also caught up with Amy last night (watched Gone Girl, one crazy story I tell ya -- is it out in KK?), and it was really quite nice. It was her last day of school yesterday (mine in two days) and she was super happy. We talked about all things... and somewhere along the night, I spurted out about mum and dad fighting sunday night. I don't know it came on... but I guess I just had all these feelings I didn't what to do with. It was comforting to hear things like, "I can understand what you're going through right now" and "I don't know how you can deal with it day-to-day", "If they knew how much they were affecting you right now..." I needed that, but sometimes I wonder if I'm coming on to strong... we hadn't met up in a few weeks, and really, do I have to go on about my family?
Tis the deal with friendship and relationships we have, I guess.